We at TeamWED have found ourselves cornered by many a groom-to-be who wanted to know just what the mother of the groom duties are. We thought that perhaps these desperate grooms are simply looking for something for moms who want to be involved and don’t know what to do, which was more than enough of a reason for us to write up a list of mother of the groom duties. After all, the mother of the bride has plenty to do, so why not the bride’s FMIL? Here’s a short list of the typical mother of the groom duties:

• Reach out to the parents of the bride to connect if they aren’t already well acquainted.

• In conjunction with the MOB, she may host a lunch or dinner so the two families can get to know one another and discuss wedding details.

• Help with the creating of a list of potential groom’s side invitees.

• The parents of the groom are responsible for hosting the rehearsal dinner.

• Traditionally, the mother of the groom waits until the mother of the bride has chosen a dress for the wedding so they can coordinate with regard to colors and formality level.

• She should help track down responses from those members of her family and social circle who have not RSVPed in a timely fashion.

• The mother of the groom should be part of the post-ceremony receiving line if there will be one.

• And finally, she will dance with the groom at the reception in the event that there is a special mother-son dance.

Huh, at first glance, it doesn’t look like the mother of the groom duties are anywhere near as extensive as the mother of the bride duties, but wait. We only shared the typical list of tasks that are really required by the rules of wedding etiquette. Most MOGs, we’ve noticed, go above and beyond the call of duty, and they do so gladly because they’re happy to be involved with the wedding. Many brides-to-be find themselves shopping alongside their FMILs, sometimes for gowns and sometimes for vendors. Often, the mom is willing to go places and do things that the groom-to-be would rather not, like choosing centerpiece arrangements. And maybe most importantly, lots of MOGs are contributing not only to the rehearsal dinner, but also to the wedding itself, lessening the burden on the parents of the bride and the couple, who these days are more likely than not paying for at least part of the wedding.

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