We won’t say all, but it’s true that *most* mothers of the bride cannot get enough of wedding planning. Brides with moms who know all about how to plan a wedding are in luck. They don’t have to coach their moms through the process of hiring vendors and shopping for the wedding gown. Brides whose moms are younger and have never planned a wedding, on the other hand, may find that they have to walk their moms through some of the finer points of wedding planning. To help these latter brides check items off their to-do lists while also staying sane, we’ve compiled a list of mother of the bride duties.
That’s right, mother of the bride duties. While the mother of the bride can help any which way, there are certain specific mother of the bride duties that we’ll enumerate below. The mother of the bride can and should:
1. Gather venue recommendations, and help her daughter find the perfect one. MOBs with contacts in the wedding planning world should utilize their personal networks to complete this most important of tasks
2. Work directly with the wedding coordinator (if her daughter has hired one). She may even be the primary contact for the coordinator in the months leading up to the wedding. The MOB may not be making decisions, but she can help keep things organized.
3. Help the bride choose her wedding dress and attend all of the fittings. Those dull fittings can be great mother-daughter bonding time!
4. Maintain the master guest list. Let’s face it — a lot of the wedding guests at today’s weddings are invited by the MOB, so why shouldn’t she help with the guest list duties? The MOB can collect addresses from the groom’s family, collect RSVPs, and get in touch with all those invitees who are slow to respond to the wedding invitations.
5. Work with the MOG (mother of the groom) to find coordinating wedding day outfits. This is more important than you think, at least to the moms themselves. It wouldn’t do to have them clash or, worse, for one mom to wear a suit or dress that is much more formal than the other.
6. Help organize and then attend the pre-wedding parties. The MOB might plan an engagement party or the rehearsal dinner. Nowadays, the MOB can even help plan the bridal shower, though this was frowned upon back in the day because it supposedly made the bride’s family seem greedy.
7. Give the bride something blue or lend her something borrowed.
8. Keep things running smoothly on the day of the wedding. The MOB usually feels invested in the wedding, making her a great candidate for unofficial day-of coordinator. She can hand out tips to vendors, make sure everyone is standing where they ought to be standing, oversee the dinner service at the reception, etc.
9. Stand in the receiving line. It’s boring, but you’d be surprised how many MOBs love standing in the receiving line because it’s there that they can boast of their extreme happiness. Doesn’t she deserve to sparkle?
10. Be there for the bride (and groom) every step of the way. The bride may need to cry when planning her wedding. She may need to cry just before the wedding or just after. The MOB should offer her shoulder up whenever the bride needs one.
