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Groomsmen Duties: What Are They?

January 19, 2010 By TeamWED Leave a Comment

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Brides who have seen the lengthy lists of bridesmaids duties may be thinking that there are similarly long lists of groomsmen duties, but that isn’t the case. While the bridesmaids are expected to help the bride address wedding invitations, fold wedding programs, and shop for the wedding dress, the groomsmen aren’t expected to do much at all. Rent a tux… attend all the pre-wedding parties… help plan the bachelor party… serve as ushers… and that’s about it. Of course, that’s the just basic list of groomsmen duties. There’s no reason the groom can’t ask his best buds to help out with wedding planning like the bride usually does with her gal pals. Get the men involved!

(Photo by Lori Photography)

Filed Under: Groomsmen

Groomsmen Are Great, But What Do They Do

November 20, 2009 By TeamWED Leave a Comment

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Oh, how we here at TeamWED envy the men in the wedding party. Unlike the long list of bridesmaid duties one sees practically everywhere, the groomsmen have very little to do in preparation for the wedding. While the bridesmaids are folding invitations and calling around to shops for the perfect shade of shoe, the groom and his groomsmen are usually out somewhere playing video games or a round of golf… oblivious to all the wedding planning going on around them, of course.

And yet, we still love the men in the wedding party, even though the typical list of groomsmen duties is shorter than Pamela Anderson’s skirts. So what are the groomsmen duties we *don’t* hear so much about when planning a wedding? We’ve compiled a list of groomsmen duties that you can give your fiance well in advance of the wedding. Whether he passes it on to his buddies is another story.

Before the Wedding

  • Throw the groom a bachelor party or stag weekend… in addition to this, the groomsmen may throw the groom a “man shower.”
  • Assist the groom with any planning duties he may be taking care of, like choosing the music for the wedding reception or finding wedding florists in the area.
  • Rent, reserve, or buy the tuxedo or suit indicated by the groom or the bride well in advance of the wedding.
  • Take part in the wedding rehearsal. Attend and possibly help plan the rehearsal dinner.

During the Wedding

  • Assist the groom as he gets ready for the wedding ceremony. Ask him what he needs, from a fresh razor to a new stick of deoderant.
  • Hand out wedding programs if you’re including them in your wedding ceremony.
  • Seat guests as the enter the ceremony venue.
  • Answer any questions wedding guests pose, from “Where are the restrooms?” to “When is this wedding going to start already?”
  • If the wedding attendants will be walking in pairs during the processional, the groomsmen duties will usually include escorting a bridesmaid down the aisle.
  • The best man may be asked to hold the wedding rings and to hand them over at the appropriate time.
  • One or more groomsmen may be asked to recite a reading during the ceremony.
  • Collect any forgotten coats and hats before moving to the reception venue.
  • Ensuring that all guests have a ride to the reception venue after the ceremony has ended.
  • Prior to the start of the reception, groomsmen will participate in nearly all of the posed group wedding photographs.
  • At the reception, the groomsmen duties may include (again) answering questions posed by wedding guests and dancing with the bridesmaids or any single ladies.

Like we said, there’s usually not that much that groomsmen are asked to do with regard to actually planning the wedding. But it’s not like that can’t change! As more brides and grooms pay for their own weddings, more grooms are getting involved in the wedding planning process. We hope that will mean that the list of groomsmen duties starts to look a little more like the list of bridesmaids duties sometime in the near future. If grooms are shopping for wedding invitations and choosing between caterers and assembling wedding favors, they’re going to need just as much help as the bride, no?

(Photo by Jayray24)

Filed Under: Attendants, Best Man Speech, Groomsmen Tagged With: best man, Groomsmen, wedding planning

Bridesmaids Pay For…

November 9, 2009 By TeamWED Leave a Comment

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We think that the best part about writing for TeamWed is answering reader mail! Brides and grooms and bridesmaids from just about everywhere write to us to have their wedding planning questions answered all the time nowadays, so you can imagine we have a bit of a blacklog of queries. We’re working on it, though, so expect to see regular features in which we get to the bottom of your questions. Here’s one that we get at least once a week:

I’m getting married next year, and my fiance and I have chosen to have a big wedding party. I mean BIG! It’ll be an uneven wedding party, too, with fourteen bridesmaids on my side and ten groomsmen on his. Don’t worry; our ceremony venue can handle it, thank God. My question is what are we supposed to pay for when it comes to our wedding attendants? Back when I got engaged, I dreamed about paying for my bridesmaids’ dresses, shoes, and jewelry, but it’s not looking like that will be possible. The same goes for the groomsmen and their tuxedos. Some of our bridesmaids and groomsmen are coming from out of town, and we wanted to put them up for at least one night (our reception venue is a hotel) but again, our budget is getting in the way. So what do we HAVE to pay for? — BeeSmart

Before we answer Bee’s question, can we just let out a collective whistle? Because that is a lot of wedding attendants! Not that there’s anything wrong with that, especially if the ceremony venue is big enough to hold them all without anyone having to stand on anyone else’s feet. Kudos to Bee and her groom for having the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen *they* want to have, even if it means having uneven sides and causing some people to do double-takes during the processional!

Now on to her query. The short answer is that the bridesmaids and groomsmen (and maid of honor and best man) traditionally shoulder all their own expenses, from the bridesmaids’ dresses to the best man’s tuxedo to the services of the stylist to the hotel where everyone will be staying. On top of that, the attendants are usually on the hook for the bridal shower and the bachelor party, and sometimes even for a bachelorette party or multiple showers. What can we say? It’s not easy being a wedding attendant, and woe unto those who have so many friends that they’re being asked to stand at the altar six or more times each year.

This means Bee doesn’t really HAVE to pay for any of her bridesmaids’ expenses if she doesn’t want to or can’t afford it. However, if she can afford to pay for a little something, like earring and necklace sets for her bridesmaids or the services of the hair stylist and makeup artist for the whole wedding party, she should definitely do that. As for the hotel accommodations, if Bee or Bee’s family can’t afford to put the out-of-town bridesmaids up for the night, perhaps they can at least work out a deal for a discounted block of rooms with the hotel… or even offer to put the out-of-town bridesmaids up for the night so they don’t have to worry about accommodations at all!

Filed Under: Advice from Recent Brides, Ask A Wedding Pro, Attendants, Bridesmaids, Groomsmen