Brides who are planning to take outdoor wedding photographs should let their wedding stylists know since the bridal makeup that will look best outdoors will be different than the makeup that will look good indoors. Outdoor wedding photography frequently turns out beautifully because diffuse outdoor lighting makes for great wedding portraits. However, we’d warn all brides and grooms interested in outdoor wedding photography should make sure that they are allowed to take photographs in an outdoor location. Some parks and beaches may require that brides and grooms doing anything wedding-related therein apply for a permit, even if they’re not getting married there.

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Almost all brides and grooms buy gifts for their attendants (and sometimes parents) but some couples take it a step further and buy pre-wedding presents for each other. The bride’s gift and groom’s gift can be anything from tickets to a sporting event to jewelry for the wedding day. Sometimes the groom will have a small gift sent up to the bridal chamber on the morning of the wedding, or the bride will secretly book a special activity for the honeymoon, like snorkeling or hiking. Remember, though, that this exchange of gifts is by no means mandatory, so it’s up to you whether you will buy a pre-wedding gift for your spouse-to-be.

(Photo by Kevin Dooley)

Cold feet are normal, and almost everyone gets them. Don’t worry too much about cold feet unless your feelings are getting in the way of your day-to-day life. Passing thoughts questioning whether marriage is the right choice don’t signify danger, but if you’re absolutely paralyzed by fear of the future, reassess your choices. One of the best ways to deal with cold feet is to talk to someone you trust. Some brides feel comfortable airing their doubts in front of their spouse-to-be, but most of the people we’ve talked to felt more comfortable admitting cold feet to their moms and best friends.

(Photo by SashaW)

Second weddings… the TeamWED gals decided to have a little brainstorming session about second weddings, also known as encore weddings, and these are some of the words that popped into our heads:

• Bridal suit
• Small wedding
• No gifts please
• Eloping
• Family wedding
• Older brides
• Simple ceremony
• Casual reception

And so on and so forth. Basically the second wedding we envisioned in our heads was small, casual, bland, and frankly, dull as dirt. Brides and grooms who want their second weddings to be understated affairs are one thing, but brides and grooms who feel pressured into having a tiny wedding because they’ve been married before are quite another. Society definitely pressured encore brides and encore grooms to keep things low key when they say their “I dos,” lest they be accused of flaunting their inability to succeed at marriage the first time around.

To that, we say “Excuse me?!” Putting aside the fact that some encore brides and encore grooms are widows or widowers, this isn’t the 1950s anymore. A huge number of people now believe that it’s healthier to leave a bad marriage than to stay trapped in it to avoid nasty comments from judgmental people. So assuming for a moment that there’s nothing wrong with marrying a second (or third or whatever) time, why does one’s encore wedding have to be a staid and quiet occasion?

Answer: It doesn’t. There’s absolutely no reason in the world that a second-time bride has to wear an understated bridal suit instead of a big beautiful wedding gown. She can even, contrary to the old advice, wear white if she really wants to. The notion that wearing white was reserved for virgins went out the window a long, looooong time ago. And second-time brides and second-time grooms can plan a big blowout wedding if they really want to since they can frequently afford it, what with being older and more established in their careers.

We say that anything goes, within the realms of good taste of course. You may get a few disapproving comments from select friends or relatives, especially those in the older crowd who grew up with different ideas about how divorced women and men behave, but don’t let the opinions of what is certainly a minority keep you from having the wedding you really want. This goes double or triple for those second-time brides and second-time grooms who are marrying people who have never before been married. It wouldn’t be at all nice to deny them the traditional nuptial experience just because their first ever wedding happens to be your encore wedding. Be as fabulous as you want to be!

But do keep one thing in mind when planning an encore wedding! Try to be just a tad conscientious when drawing up your guest list. While you may be good friends with your ex or tremendously tight with your former in-laws, your intended (or their family) may not relish the idea of having to shake hands with people from your “past life” in the receiving line. Plus, as close as you are with your ex, they can feel a tad uncomfortable — let’s call it wistful — watching you pledge your undying fidelity to the new love of your life.

Good luck, and congrats to all the second-time brides!

A lot of brides and grooms balk at the notion of writing wedding vows, but the process shouldn’t be a daunting one. Wedding vows can be anything from a short declaration of your love for your partner or a long description of your courtship. Whether you like long or short wedding vows, however, writing wedding vows should be an activity fueled by feelings. Here are some ideas of thoughts to include when writing wedding vows: Where did you meet? What was your life like before you met? When did you realize you were in love? What dreams and goals do you share? How is your love unique? What have you learned from one another? What does marriage mean to you?

A bride who said her “I dos” this past August wrote to tell us how much she enjoyed all the wedding planning advice here at Daily Wedding Planning Tip, and we are so glad we could help! But we did ask one thing of her in return for the help we offered… no, not her firstborn! We asked her to share a piece of advice with all the brides-to-be who read our blog. She said yes, of course, and we’re delighted to pass her tip on to you. She said:

I’d tell future brides that they should do things the traditional way and not see the groom (or bride, I guess) until the ceremony. That means even if you’re getting married in the evening and have to wait all day, don’t even peek at your groom until you’re walking down the aisle. That’s what my husband and I did, and it made everything so much more magical and special. And exciting and emotional!

We actually saved time by taking all the wedding pictures we were in separately (like me with the bridesmaids and me with the groomsman and my husband with the attendants, etc.) so we’d have more time to take the pictures of just us. Doing it that way was kind of a pain because in our small ceremony venue we had to work to avoid each other, but it was worth it! I’d do it again in a second, if I had to. Walking into the church and seeing the groom for the first time that day was amazing.

We bet it was! But we also understand that with all the details that go into making a wedding day perfect, it’s not always easy to keep out of sight before the ceremony. Sure, if you are working with a talented wedding planner, he or she will make sure nothing goes wrong while you relax with your bridesmaids in the bridal suite. The rest of us have to figure out how to make ourselves scarce while also wrangling flower girls, finding the stylist who’s gone missing again, and keeping our newly divorced uncle from hitting on our friends. The best way to do this is to enlist the help of people like the mother of the bride, the maid of honor, the best man, and anyone else who might be willing to help hold down the fort while you’re making yourself stunning.

However, what if the issue isn’t getting things done before the wedding but convincing your bride or groom that steering clear of one another before the wedding is a good idea? In that case, if you’re a bride and your intended is the groom, consider playing up how busy and girly and ultra-estrogenic things will be in the bridal suite. Or just say that ladies will be changing their clothes in there and no men are allowed save the wedding photographer. Then again, you could just try telling the one you love that this is important to you and it’s just one day, so give in already!

You may be wondering if we here on TeamWED kept a bit of distance between ourselves and our spouses on the wedding day. Well a quick poll of all our bloggers reveals that, yup, all but two of us didn’t see our hubbies before saying “I do.” We asked the odd chicks out why they chose to buck the trend and meet with their spouses before walking down the aisle. The two that didn’t, it turns out, are Jewish, so they had to meet before the ceremony to sign the ketubah, or Jewish wedding contract. Otherwise is seems that not seeing the groom before the wedding ceremony is one old tradition that is alive and well… at least here at TeamWED! And you know, we agree with the bride quoted above. Not seeing our grooms before the wedding made the ceremony seem that much more exciting. Plus, we got to see the look on their faces when we revealed ourselves at the ceremony venue doors. Now that was priceless!

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